Watch me work – rewriting linkedin profile summary draft part II

I am back with another draft of my linkedin summary. If you missed it, go check out part one.

My reflection

I am structuring the summary the right way, but it doesn’t feel like it is completely there yet in terms of having that solid umph. You know what I mean? Writing that first, mouthwatering, juicy-steak type opening will take some time I think. I will have to eventually just decide on a draft and then evolve it over time.

Why write multiple drafts? 

Writing multiple drafts allows you to articulate your message in different ways. You can play around with a variety of angles and then pick and choose the parts that resonate well with you. Don’t forget to follow along by downloading the presentation and worksheet. They will help get into details.

It may help to go back to see my starting point. 

Here is the latest copy that I am working with: 

When I was 13, I wrote in my journal that I wanted to go and live in China for an extended period of time. For 8 years I have been living that dream.

I’ve been studying human potential and leadership for over 15 years. I have been applying those learnings to empower myself and those around me, in many different shapes and forms.

People call me a “creative leader,” “out-of-the-box thinker,” I’ve also been told that I am a good listener who can show empathy without judgement.

I have been using my powers of creativity, leadership and tech obsession to work with:

Freelancers & Small Businesses. Still haven’t launched that website yet? Struggling to narrow down your audience? I can help you get clear and get it done.

Marketing Directors & Managers. Being “busy” should be a stressful thing. I can help reinvigorate you and your team to be more creative and focused on working together.

Frustrated Professionals. Thinking of quitting? Feel like there is more you want to do in your life? I can walk you through a process for sifting through your thinking.

Event Organizers, Conference Organizers & Associations. Need a keynote speaker on personal development? I can help rock the stage.

Download the Working With Paris PDF below or take a look at one of my ebooks to get started.

I’m still focusing on pretty much the same clientele. I think that might remain the same throughout. I will need to also test whether or not it is in line with their needs. Yep! more research later.

What do you think of the latest draft? Is it getting better or worse?

 

2 thoughts on “Watch me work – rewriting linkedin profile summary draft part II”

  1. I like this one better. I think it’s great to start with your personal achievement, it gives credibility to what you do. And the use of underlined text brings out the key points better. The writing is better articulated compares to the previous one. This draft is definitely better.

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